#MediaMondayTip: How grown-ups can help girls stressed out by “Snapstreaks”

5 min read

By Emma Everett, MEDIAGIRLS editorial intern

In one of our of recent MEDIAGIRLS classes, we asked 11 girls in middle school if they would quit Snapchat today if their friends agreed to as well. We told them to keep their hands down if they enjoyed Snapchat and found it fun. Every single girl raised her hand. When we asked why, they said, “It’s the streaks, they’re exhausting” and “way too much pressure.” They commiserated that it started first thing in the morning and lasted all day, and is “just too much.”

Let’s back up…

As you are probably aware, teens are all over Snapchat. In fact, the social-media platform happens to be their fan-favorite, not just because it allows them to send their friends photos and videos with silly filters, but because it has become one of their main sources of chatting among their friends. From the time they get up until they go to bed, teens are using Snapchat to be in constant communication with their friends.

What are Snapstreaks?

Instead of texting, Snapchat is the new way for teens to stay in touch, but it has become increasingly addictive with the added feature of Snapstreaks. Here’s how it works: If you send a snap to a friend multiple days in a row, a number will appear with emojis next to their contact name. So if you and your friend have a Snapstreak of 37, that means you have been sending each other snaps back and forth for 37 days. When you are about to lose a Snapstreak, meaning it’s been almost 24 hours since your last Snapchat interaction with the other person, Snapchat warns you by putting the hourglass emoji next to your Snapstreak number. Time is running out!

We asked our MEDIAGIRLS youth advisory board, made of preteens and teens, for their take on Snapstreaks. Naomi F. sees the experience as mostly positive: “I personally like them because I like keeping in contact with my friends, and their snaps are always hilarious. They are fun to do because it’s kind of a challenge to keep up with, but I get how much pressure it can be to keep up with them once you have reached the 100-day mark.”

Putting a number on friendships

It’s this pressure that Naomi F. refers to that is the biggest problem with Snapstreaks, according to our participants, as well as recent research. According to Business Insider, the constant need to keep up Snapstreaks makes them stressful to those who use them, and has become a way for tweens and teens to put a number value on their relationships; in their world, this translates to the higher the Snapstreak, the stronger the friendship.

As Shira M. describes, oftentimes, Snapstreaks are a crucial determinant of who is a best friend, and who’s just a friend. “I have even had a friend say to me once that we needed to get a Snapstreak going, because if we didn’t, I couldn’t be on her best friends list on Snapchat,” she says. Because teens are on Snapchat so often, this obsession can hurt their friendships in the real world. Maisie K, another youth advisor, explains, “It really annoys me when I’m hanging out with my friends, and instead of talking to me, they check their Snapchat. It’s so infuriating!”

Break a streak, break a friendship

And the more teens use it, the more they value Snapstreaks. In fact, breaking a Snapstreak among teens can break a friendship. To some, breaking a streak means the other person didn’t care about the time and effort put into creating it in the first place. Our youth advisor Sola A. describes, “There’s pressure to keep the streak going, even if it results in stress caused by the fear that if you break it, your friends will think you don’t like them anymore.” Teens don’t want to be seen as bad friends, so they’re motivated to constantly keep up. Hence the exhaustion.

Sasha K. adds that Snapstreaks may seem less harmful because they don’t offer the same reciprocation as a “like” on Instagram, and there’s no way for anyone else to see who you have your streaks with and for how long. Regardless of these differences, though, Snapstreaks still manipulate girls into believing they’ll let down their friends if they aren’t constantly maintaining the streak.


On its own, Snapchat is not inherently bad. Girls send silly pictures with filters to their friends, and it’s far less “polished” and curated than Instagram. But it is important for girls to be attuned to how it makes them feel. As Annie S. eloquently explains, “If you can be confident in yourself and know that sending pictures on an app doesn’t define you, it’s fun, but if you find yourself at all stressed about it, then it’s not worth it.”

If your girl(s) are on Snapchat, ask them the same questions we asked our Youth Advisory Board:

  • Do you engage in Snapstreaks?
  • Do you think they’re good or bad for girls, and why?

From there, gauge their responses, and if they don’t think there’s a problem with Snapstreaks, help them understand the potentially harmful aspects at stake by sharing other girls’ responses. Sending silly pictures to friends is harmless, but if girls feel pressured to stay on top of Snapstreaks day or night out of fear their friendships might shatter, the grown ups in their lives can offer an alternate perspective.

 May 1, 2017: this post has been updated to reflect the correct author.

Emma EverettEmma Everett is a junior at Boston University studying Advertising with a minor in Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies. She was a MEDIAGIRLS teacher, and ran the Boston Marathon.

Michelle Cove is the Executive Director of MEDIAGIRLS®, a nonprofit organization that teaches girls how to critique the way girls and women are portrayed in pop culture with an emphasis on creating empowering content.

She is also an award-winning filmmaker, journalist, and author whose projects have been featured on numerous national platforms including “The Oprah Winfrey Show,” Katie Couric’s talk show “Katie,” “The Today Show,” The Washington Post, and The New York Times.

Visit www.mediagirls.org to learn more.

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  1. Kelly Pietrangeli

    Great article. A couple of months ago someone from Digital Awareness UK came and gave a talk to my 14 year old’s class. Whatever they said made such an impact on him! He came home and said he and another friend deleted their snapchat accounts together right after the talk!

    He said he realised how silly it all was and such a waste of time. The pressure each day to keep up the steaks all felt so pointless when I stopped to think about it. He’s never signed up again! I’ll share this great post with my Project Me mamas. 🙂

    • Dorothy Ponton, Digital Marketing Manager

      Hi Kelly, Thanks for sharing this post with your Project Me mamas! If you don’t mind sharing, now that Snapchat is deleted, what are some other ways your 14yr old is keeping in touch with friends?


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